Of family fights, epic AUs and silly dum dums
by Cats-Cinnamon
Summary: A collection for ML fandom week 2016. Marinette's always spoken before she could think, so it's a good thing her parents are so supportive, right? Also, what would happen in a universe where Ladybug and Chat Noir weren't Paris' first heroes? Or what if Gabriel knew more than he let on? Plagg gets his puns from an unexpected source.
1. Day 1 - RevealFamily

It was a usual Saturday night for Marinette and her family. The bakery was closed on a Sunday and so whilst they did stay open until seven o' clock on Fridays and Saturdays, the Dupain-Cheng's were minus the usual after-hours rush to get the ovens cleaned, dishes washed and all utensils lined up perfectly for the morning. Saturday nights also meant that they all managed to get in the family time together that they never really managed to have during the week, where they all either sat and watched the television, played a family board game or had a mini game tournament which Sabine always joined at the start, only to simply give up a couple of rounds in and watch her two favourite people compete.

It happened that on that specific night, they had all settled for a nice, calm game of Monopoly. Which then inevitably devolved into an argument between father and daughter ( _"I know you cheated, how else would you have gotten an extra 250?" "Uh… Maybe the_ banker _accidentally gave it to me?" "You_ are _the banker!")_ in the end, Sabine Dupain-Chen had firmly put a stop to their childish behavior and the board game was packed away and the television was on. After a brief tussle (when had their daughter gotten so strong?), Sabine's severe admonishment stopped Marinette and Tom in their tracks and Sabine found herself in charge of the remote.

"Now, I don't know what has gotten into you two tonight, but you are both going to sit down and watch the news like _adults_ and you two are going to get along, because that is what family _does_." Sabine reprimanded, settling in between her daughter and husband.

"It's just friendly fun." Marinette assured her mother, Tom nodding vigorously. Sabine stayed silent, seeming to be engrossed in the scandal about Disneyland Paris apparently charging Germans double the price.

 _"And onto breaking news with our correspondent, Nadja Chamak. Nadja?"_ The presenter interrupted. The screen cut to a scene of chaos in what must have once been La Défense, but was now effectively a war zone.

 _"Thank you, Julien. It is an hour into the akuma attack and there is still no sign of Ladybug. The latest akuma, calling themselves L'anonyme, is currently engaged in battle with Chat Noir, but it is as yet unknown if Chat Noir will be able to contain the akuma himself. I-"_ Nadja was cut off as a beige coloured beam hit her. _"Wha- who are you? Who am I?"_

Marinette stiffened in her seat, glancing across at her parents. Biting her lip, she tried to act as normal (read – sketchy as heck) as possible in front of her parents. Not daring to meet their eyes, she looked down as she spoke. "I – uh – I need the bathroom!" She blurted and stood.

Before she could race to the door, Marinette's wrist was ensnared in a vice-like grip she would have expected from her huge, muscled father and not her petite mother, but Sabine was full of surprises that night.

"Now, now, Marinette. We see what's going on here." Tom said, sharing a _look_ with his wife.

Sweating now, Marinette gulped. "You – you do?" Tom tugged Marinette down so she was nestled between him and Sabine, both holding her soothingly. Sabine opened her mouth to speak and Marinette flinched, a defense on the tip of her tongue

"Of course, sweetie. You're scared of Ladybug, aren't you?" Sabine asked

"It's a lie I'm not Ladybug!" Marinette yelled at the same time, ripping out of her family's embrace.

"Wait, what?" They all said at the same time. Now standing, Marinette blushed and a bead of sweat trickled down the nape of her neck.

"I-I mean, I'm not _scared_ of Ladybug! Yeah, I'm not scared of me – I mean, Ladybug. Who I am not. Because of course I'm not Ladybug. I mean, she wears a skin tight suit. I don't have anything like that in my closet, you know that. N-not that I'm saying that _Ladybug_ has one lying round anywhere – there aren't any buttons or zippers. I-it's probably magical or something. Not that I'd know if Ladybug wears a magical suit, which I'm not. Ladybug, I mean. I'm not…" She trailed off as she caught sight of her parent's face. "I'm out, aren't I?" Her mother sternly nodded while her father paled drastically.

"You have a lot of explaining to do, young lady." Sabine scolded, but then sighed. "But first, I think you have a city to save."

Marinette sheepishly nodded, racing to grab her bag with Tikki and race up the hatch to her room.

"Wait a minute. Or daughter's… Ladybug?" Tom asked slowly. Sabine pinched the bridge of her nose briefly, but then leaned up to kiss her husband's cheek.

"It'll work out, honey."


	2. Day 2 - AUFriendship

_AU where everything's the same, except ADRIEN AND MARINETTE AREN'T CHAT AND LB, BUT INSTEAD NINO AND ALYA ARE Volpina and Turtle –Speed and defense, respectively ALSO THEY AREN'T DUM DUMS AND ACTUALLY TELL EACH OTHER THEIR IDENTITIES_

It was a regular Monday for Adrien as he walked in late from a photoshoot. For a job that basically required him to sit around and have his makeup done for three hours, modelling was an exhausting experience even if he factored in going to bed at eight the previous night and getting a solid nine hours of sleep. So it was no surprise that upon sitting at his usual seat, Adrien barely noticed his new partner nor the whispers going around the room. "Hey, Nino" he greeted before flopping his head down on his arms.

"'Sup Adrien." Nino replied from behind him. Grunting slightly, Adrien's eyes slowly slid shut before snapping open as he realized what was wrong.

"Wait, why are you sitting behind me Nino?" He asked, turning to face his best friend, who was sitting rather closely to Alya.

"Took you long enough," Alya taunted. "We've decided to mix it up a little today, so I'm going to have to steal your boyfriend away from you, okay?"

"Yeah, dude. You can, like, have Marinette now." Nino chimed in. It was then that Adrien realized that he did, in fact, still have someone sitting next to him and faced Marinette, who had been emitting a strange sound that he had mistaken for a distant kettle and was sitting ramrod straight. Nino patted Adrien's shoulder. "I'm sure you two will have a blast."

"Ugh, how could anybody have a blast with _that_ wet blanket?" Chloé asked as she strutted her way in, Sabrina sniveling at the blonde's heels. Gazing distastefully down at the girl next to him, Chloé made a gesture for Adrien to stand. "Come on, Adrikins. You can swap with Sabrina. I wouldn't want you to have to lower yourself to such trash."

Marinette was going red in the face at this point; not in the usual embarrassed blush that she had painted on around Adrien, but instead in an anger he secretly admired but seldom saw.

Glancing at Marinette's fingers tightening on the polished wood of their shared desk, Adrien attempted to defuse the situation before one or both of them – likely Marinette – would get expelled. "Its fine, Chloé, really. I wouldn't want to trouble you and…" He trailed off as Alya spoke.

"The only trash that I see around here is _you_ , Chloé. So why don't you sit you wide butt down and leave Marinette alone?" The partial-redhead seethed, pointing to Chloé's usual spot. Marinette was looking down now, still not having spoken a word. Chloé engaged Alya in a staring contest, blue eyes meeting golden brown, before Chloé huffed and sat down.

"I was just trying to do a nice thing for my dear, sweet, Adrikins, but whatever." Chloé waved her hand in a 'don't talk to me gesture' and whipped out her phone to show Sabrina something on the screen, effectively putting an end to their 'conversation'.

"Well… That was something, huh?" Adrien asked Marinette, who refused to meet his eyes. She seemed to open her mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Mme. Bustier.

It was a couple of hours later that Adrien was able to talk to Marinette again. Nino and Alya were off doing… something… and they had a good hour or so until lunch ended. Factoring in that Chloé seemed to be set on taking him to some fancy vegan café and was looking for him, Adrien decided that his best bet was to stick with Marinette. Drawing up his courage, Adrien spoke. "So…"

"Do you think they're making out?" Marinette suddenly asked before closing her mouth with an audible snap. Adrien almost bounced with joy at finally having something to talk about, but played off his wide smile by leaning in close.

"Between you and me?" He asked, looking around conspiratorially. The only people nearby were two girls deeply engrossed in a live feed of Volpina and Dragon Shell to overhear them. "I think they're leading double lives."

Marinette's deep inhalations quickened until they became snorts and then laughter, making Adrien blink. "S-so you're saying they're secret agents or something?"

Adrien was deeply insulted by Marinette's take on the situation. "Of course they're not secret agents! They're obviously Volpina and Dragon Shell." Marinette only snorted louder. "Well how _else_ do you explain everything? It's just like in all the manga! I mean, have you _ever_ seen Alya and Volpina in the same room together? Or even Nino and Dragon Shell, for that matter? Well?"

Marinette seemed shocked by how personally he was taking it. "Well, I guess, but…"

"And they're always missing when Volpina and Dragon Shell are around, and if they are then it's either Alya and Dragon Shell together or Nino and Volpina. Not to mention, _Volpina and Dragon Shell kissed last night_."

"So?"

"Didn't you notice that Alya and Nino were sitting pretty close this morning? Nino even switched with you!"

Now Marinette was rolling her eyes. "Most of that can be explained by _my_ making out theory. They're obviously scared to tell us – they don't want us to feel like third wheels or something. Which is _also_ why they made us sit together." Marinette explained.

"What do you mean?" Adrien asked, his cheeks turning pink. He thought he knew what she meant, but he had to make sure they were on the same page.

If Adrien was pink, Marinette was as red as a ladybird. "They've been trying to set us up all year, they probably want to go on double dates or something."

"Oh. Well even if you're right, I still think they're hiding some other kind of secret." Adrien defended.

"You read way too many mangas. I can't believe you're such a nerd." Marinette teased, elbowing him.

"Oh, please. They're _cultural_."

"They're _childish_."

Adrien puffed up in mock outrage. "You'll eat your words, Marinette. Just read _Death Note_."

"I'm not going to buy some stupid comic book to make you happy, Adrien." Marinette sighed. How do you explain to a rich boy that you only get a small amount of allowance and month?

"Who said you had to buy anything? I'll lend you mine, let's go." Adrien was wriggling like a puppy as he grabbed his friend's wrist. "We still have 45 minutes left of lunch."

Marinette let Adrien drag her along, momentarily forgetting about her huge crush on him to simply revel in the excitement of her friend. Adrien, on the other hand, was very aware of Marinette, eager to listen to the true side of Marinette and enjoy her acting normal around him for as long as he could, ignoring the odd burning feeling in his chest as Marinette slipped her hand into his.

From the recesses behind an air duct on the school's roof, Volpina and Dragon Shell looked down at their friends, on the quiet slap of their hands. "Bon travail."


End file.
